{"id":162080,"date":"2021-07-06T19:53:21","date_gmt":"2021-07-07T02:53:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dailyactor.com\/?p=162080"},"modified":"2021-07-06T20:00:13","modified_gmt":"2021-07-07T03:00:13","slug":"noel-douglas-orput-book-wait-im-the-a-hole","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dailyactor.com\/blogs\/noel-douglas-orput-book-wait-im-the-a-hole\/","title":{"rendered":"Actor Noel Douglas Orput Shares an Excerpt From His Book, ‘Wait, I’m The A\u2014Hole?’"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

I knew I wanted to be an actor from a very young age.<\/strong> And after two decades of living my dream, I\u2019m ready to share a few of my tales; some good, some bad, all painfully hilarious.<\/p>\n

In this first collection of comedic anecdotes, you will meet a circus of characters who are deliciously unscrupulous; there\u2019s the maniacal, Capote-esque acting teacher who will stop at nothing to make his students cry; a slick talent agent who has a few schemes up his ketchup-stained sleeve; a seductive costumer in Columbus with a surprising fetish. There\u2019s Dom and Sweaty Steve, a creepy duo who hold an audition that could\u2019ve ended in a shirtless bloodbath, and you will get to spend a humiliating day on the set of a Budweiser commercial where narcissism flowed like beer. The book is available on Amazon.<\/a><\/p>\n

One of the worst things for an actor to hear after \u201cNext!\u201d is \u201cYou know who you look like?\u201d This unsolicited opinion is inevitably followed by some famous individual who looks nothing like you and you are left with the options of either intensely debating how little you actually resemble the person or flashing an agonizing smile and saying \u201cThank you.\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve heard a slew of actors over the years. There was the older couple that I waited on at a restaurant in Center Lovell, Maine who claimed I was the spitting image of Joseph Cotton<\/strong>. My ignorance led me to a frantic Google search where I was relieved to learn that Joseph Cotton wasn\u2019t a white supremacist from the Old South but rather a respectable screen actor from The Golden Age of Hollywood. There have been a few casting directors who said Jeff Goldblum<\/strong><\/a>; I figured mainly because we\u2019re both pretty tall. But after meeting Jeff a couple times, while we are both of the same height, his magnetic aura stands in sharp contrast to my clumsy, social awkwardness. Also, we have vastly different shaped ears. I\u2019ve been told I look like Norm MacDonald, Joel McHale, Rowan Atkinson, Michael Shannon<\/a><\/strong>, and the janitor from Scrubs<\/em>. And there was the time I dressed in drag for a short film and the craft services guy excitedly told me I resembled Eileen Brennan<\/strong>. This was one of the few times that I actually agreed.<\/p>\n

I once had a meeting with an agent who stared at me for an uncomfortably long time before asking, \u201cYou know who you are?\u201d – I thought that was quite an introspective question during a meeting about what types of commercials I would be good for but I leaned into the spiritual inquiry.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m more than just Noel<\/em>,\u201d I responded. \u201cNoel is merely-\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not Brad Pitt. I mean, you\u2019re attractive but not that<\/em> attractive.\u201d<\/p>\n

I nodded, getting back on track with the shallowness of the conversation.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re like Brad Pitt<\/strong><\/a>\u2019s friend. The nice guy that the girls don\u2019t notice because you\u2019re standing next to Brad Pitt. But once Brad Pitt disappears, then they see you. And they\u2019re like, \u201cWhere the heck was he all this time?\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay,\u201d I said. \u201cI can see that.\u201d<\/p>\n

I found myself imagining being Brad Pitt\u2019s friend, forever living in the shadow of his handsomeness. I felt confident that I could eventually be okay with being second best and that we could be good friends, kicking back and swapping stories of reliable third-world adoption agencies and philanthropy.<\/p>\n

While people\u2019s intentions behind making such comparisons might be good, they only serve to add more anxiety to an already stressful profession. I\u2019m sure the intention is to compare me to some famous actor in order to give me hope that I, too, can have success. However, all it does is make me scrutinize everything about the other actor\u2019s appearance and compare it to myself. The janitor from Scrubs has a much thicker hairline than I do. That\u2019s why he\u2019s on a hit sitcom and I\u2019m picking up my monthly Propecia prescription before filing my unemployment claim.<\/em> It also makes me think, Great. Well if I look like that famous guy, he\u2019s already got the gig so seat\u2019s taken.<\/em><\/p>\n

Sometimes I wonder what gives people the right to offer such opinions which often trigger one\u2019s vulnerabilities and insecurities. But then I remind myself that we are all unique. No one looks like us. We are who we are. I sometimes fantasize about the shoe being on the other foot. I imagine myself walking into a meeting with the head of a big talent agency and saying, \u201cYou know who you look like? You are the spitting image of Harvey Weinstein.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

LESSONS LEARNED:<\/strong>
\n1. Only you look like you. No one else has what makes you unique. Well, unless you are an identical twin.<\/p>\n

2. Whenever someone asks, \u201cYou know who you look like?\u201d always answer GOD.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Actor Noel Douglas Orput shares a portion of his book about a time on set that all actors will find semi-familiar. 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